Lucy’s labored breathing woke me. Her motivation to make it outdoors in time has her lumpy and arthritic yellow Labrador body flying. Her harness rubs against the wall as she propels down the stairs.

I went out the kitchen door and was amazed that she had already made it to the drive, but she didn’t see me. I watched her sniff in an area where she, Abby, and Ricky had peed earlier in the evening. I had managed to grab my flannel coat, but my pj’s and sockless feet were no match for the cold middle of the night exposure. Being half asleep helped. I expected a quick squat, but that didn’t happen.

Since Lucy didn’t see me standing nearby, I clapped. Sometimes she can hear me, but perhaps she was also half asleep. I wonder, do dogs sleep walk?

She took off towards my Subaru. I followed. She continued and was in front of the Mini when I noticed her business making.

As she rounded the corner, she finally saw me, and wagged her tail. I gave her some exuberant atta girls. I don’t think there are too many of these left in her life. But she keeps surprising me. I trust that she will tell me when it is her time to be released from her betraying body.

Meanwhile, Ying is all scrunched up, causing me to think about how nice it would be to block life out. I’d like to not think about a friend’s recent suicide and the reverberations. Legitimate reasons don’t lessen the pain.

Life’s hard.

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