As I lounged in the sun on the deck like a regular lizard, a ladybug landed on my forearm. Instead of automatically swatting at it as if it were a fly, I paused and looked. Couldn’t see the spots. Solid red. I’ve always liked ladybugs and when I find them in my garden, I do whatever I can do to save them.
We’re all important, I tell myself, though I’m not feeling very important at the moment. Perhaps if I were important the doctor at Slocum Orthopedics would have gotten back to me. Maybe they would have called me back if I hadn’t called again today. Maybe they are just extra busy today fixing emergency situations. It’s not like my knee is an emergency.
Maybe there’s nothing wrong with my knee and that I’m blowing all of this up out of proportion like a blurry picture. After all, it only hurts when I try to bend it. Yesterday, while trying to weed the onions in the garden, I had to lie down on the ground, and if I kept my leg in certain positions, I could weed without pain.
I’m not believing that there’s nothing wrong with my knee. Now all I have to do is convince myself that there’s no rush to get it fixed. I do have time on my side. I’ve lost a month of work, but there’s less than a month left.
Why can’t I look at this time as a gift? The weather is amazing. Why can’t I be content to sit on the deck and listen to the birds? Mostly I think about how many bird feeders still need refilling.
I know that life’s a gift. I know that it could be over just like that. But knowing and feeling are two separate things. And I now that everything that happens in my life happens for a reason. Even the phone not ringing.
Maybe the phone won’t ring until I learn the valuable lesson of patience?
I may not be able to work in the garden for very long, but instead of focusing on what I can’t do, I ought to be thankful that I have a garden and have been able to do the things I’ve done.
I’ve earned some more time on the deck to contemplate these lessons.
Maybe if I leave the phone in the house, it will ring….